Hearing Gospel music makes my heart sing. Not only does my heart sing, my voice joins the sounds even though I’m far from an experienced singer. Along with my voice, my hands begin moving, as I respond to the music, much like what happens when I’m in conversation.
CONVERSATION WITH THE LORD
In truth, when I’m singing a Gospel song, I am in conversation—with The Lord.
I didn’t realize just how animated I was when I sang, until one day during a worship service while in choir, the lady next to me whispered, “I love to watch you sing.”
I was floored and apparently my face showed that too, because she continued, “You look like you’re singing directly to God.” That made my reaction even greater because, my thought process was, ‘Isn’t that what we’re supposed to do?’
WHAT CAN I BRING HIM?
One of my greatest desires is to have a deep relationship with God, the One who made me. I know I am not an accident. I know God delights in us. I know these things in my head. Yet sometimes I struggle with, ‘what can I bring to Him that will bring Him glory’. My singing isn’t grand, so it doesn’t seem likely that it should matter. But maybe, I have misunderstood what God desires from me.
We are taught that our relationship with Him isn’t about performance. It’s about being present with Him, in love, trust and worship.
FEELING INVISIBLE
As a widow, sometimes I struggle with ‘feeling invisible’. When I had my Charles, I was “Charles’ wife”, and somehow that gave me a sense of stability. When people saw or even thought of me, they’d likely also think of him.
But then my question becomes ‘Why would God want a relationship with me? Who am I now that Charles is gone? What possible thing have I to offer to Him?
HE WANTS ME
I know the answer in my head. I am His creation, intentionally designed by Him. He doesn’t need me, but He wants me. And that makes all the difference.
Even though I am human and therefore flawed, He doesn’t expect perfection from me. He desires a heart that comes humbly before Him with love, joy, trust, and worship.
This thought brings me joy! I don’t pray beautiful prayers. I don’t play a musical instrument or sing professionally, or even well. I’m not a preacher, eloquent speaker or even a teacher.
A HEART OVERFLOWING
In my mind I have nothing to bring Him, except a heart. A heart that overflows with love and an animated personality which seems to flow through my hands, voice and facial expressions when I sing! Maybe that is exactly what He wants.
My question to you is this: How do you demonstrate your love for Jesus? Worship is not confined to Sunday morning. There are hundreds of ways, from smiling at strangers, to helping carry groceries, cleaning a sidewalk, sharing a meal, to creating beautiful music and being able to sing for others.
IT’S NOT ABOUT PERFORMANCE
But again, it’s not about performance! It’s about bringing your best to the God of the universe with a heart brimming over with a love that is relentless! How we love Him matters.
Accepting Him as our Lord and Savior, and sharing that with others in whatever way that manifests itself—-matters to Him! He delights in us, and will walk us through the turbulent seasons of our lives.
For me, that means spending time in conversation with Him through prayer, reading His ‘love letters’ to us in His Word, and having quiet moments when I stop talking long enough to listen, for what He wants to share with me. These moments matter. This is worship.
IN HIS PRESENCE
These are the moments when God draws us close and allows us to experience His presence. And as widows, we especially covet those moments on the days—or even the minutes—when loneliness threatens to pull us under.
In those quiet moments, we can feel God’s pleasure. We can remember that we are not invisible. We can remember that we are still His.
And perhaps we can finally understand why we were created in the first place:
Not because of what we can do for Him, but because He simply wants us.
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